WHEN LYING IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO
When it comes to honesty, most people rank it quite high on their character value scales. Honesty is the best policy, is something so often said, and even more so believed to be true. In all things though, Is honesty ever the right thing to do. Most may take the absolutist approach, especially when it comes to relationships and matters religion (A lie, is a sinners mark). So, is there ever a situation where lying is the right thing to do. Well I guess I should start by trying to analyse why anyone would be prompted to lie in the first place.
'If you loved me you would not have lied to me in the first place", scornful and heart broken, she paces about, the glassy frames of trust have been broken, and in a bizarre way, it is an experience that is pushing her to the brink of insanity.'
Dishonesty, in any manner of ways is the most painful experience anyone can experience in a relationship. Even when both partners have been dishonest with each other, it still hurts nonetheless. Just how much can you do to spare your loved ones from the pain of the truth if you have experienced it yourself and wouldn't want anyone else to experience it. Some may argue that you shouldn't have even been in a situation that made you have to lie in the first place, but lets move past that, the damage has been done, what can be done next.
'Desperation sets in, he is tongue tied .......... at a loss for words, this really isn't how he wanted her to find out. Its too late now though. Even if he said he wanted to tell her and was just waiting for the right time there is no way for him to prove it.'
So now the damage is done, is it guilt that will prompt him to lie even more about the "incident", or is it his love for her. In times like this, with adrenaline in plenty, it is hard to think wisely under pressure, maybe its the circumstances that have prompted the lie he will tell.
'He bites his tongue, breathes in, and lies through his teeth. 'All will be well me love', he says reassuringly, shifting his gaze and looking away in shame. 'I really do not think I am good for you', the thought dashes through his mind, it has lingered there before but somehow he managed to shove it out.He really wants her to believe in him, she is his beacon of hope and he will do anything to keep her.Yes, he will do ANYTHING to make it all better for her. Sometimes, he thinks, maybe if I died, she wont have to go through all this drama. He has no self control, and he really has tried to attain that wildly sought for virtue. It is not going too well for her, she is broken, with pent up anger from all his misdeeds, she is finding it difficult to forgive.'
So now I pose this question, Is there ever a right time to lie? I guess the title of this article sort of presents itself as though it will provide a set of scenarios where it could be said that lying is the right thing. That wasn't however the objective I had when I set out to write this piece, as usual, I'm just think out aloud, after all, I am a thinker, I guess mine was just an attempt to provide closure to those who have faced a liar. There is no black and white, no one is good or bad by virtue of lying, there is no grey either, analyse each circumstance, and If you are prayerful, pray and fast. That is the only advice I can give, since dishonesty is a mountain that one cannot climb without innate grace and faith and a yearning for the good life, a mountain one cannot climb without a foundation of forgiveness.
As you read, consider this, "your neighbor is from a different tribe, and during elections, political violence has motivated ethnic cleansing. You take them in and hide them. A rumor goes round and a gang comes knocking on your door, "are you hiding this insolent fools?", think hard think fast , what would your answer be? There you have it, is there ever a right time to lie